WHAT DID 2019 TEACH YOU?

I began the year 2019 just like everybody else; high hopes for the months ahead for me personally, my family as a whole and my career. 2019 found me making strides in developing myself, my family and hopefully, my career……

In March 2019, to mark World Down syndrome Day, I collaborated with a few friends to produce a documentary showcasing five families raising their children with Down syndrome. This was a great success because not only was showed during a symposium to create awareness on Down syndrome, it was also carried by the national broadcaster, GTV on their 7 pm and 10  pm news respectively on March 21, 2019.

In April 2019, I found out that the car that I had purchased and has been using since 2017, was actually not mine because the paperwork was not in order. This led me to make the decision to park the car at a police station until the issue was resolved as I did not want any altercation with the law or its enforcement agencies.

In June 2019, I found out that the car documentation was not in order because it was a stolen car, this led to me being arrested, transported from Accra to Kumasi (the jurisdiction where the car was stolen from), held for two days – yes, I went two days without a shower, brushing my teeth or eating anything (I could not eat not because friends who heard of the case and was there did not offer but because I simply did not have the appetite), and granted bail on the third day only because the person I bought the car from was on his way to the police station.

July to September 2019 was a blur….. I was extremely depressed but had to show up for every single of my commitments – work, motherhood, social engagements, be a supportive sister etc……

I graduated with a Masters in Public Health Degree and also earning the Best Community Service Award for my work on Down syndrome awareness and advocacy

I received official notification from the job in September of my severance by December due to unavailability of funds. This news although not unexpected because the funder had indicated earlier in the year they were not going to move forward with us, came with a lot of mixed feelings.

I found out in October (intuitively earlier though) that my son cannot see with his left eye and as usual, this led to a lot of specialist consultations, reading around the issue myself to enable me to ask the relevant questions during this consultations. After about 10 weeks of consultations, we found out he can be given a high index prescription glasses coupled with some therapies for the next one year to see how the left eye can be ‘helped’.

As I write this, today is January 1 2020, and officially, I do not have a job or any income-earning venture and amazingly, there is this unusual calm over me. So, my question to you is, what did 2019 teach you?

As for me, I learnt plenty from 2019 and I will share just a few with you;

• I learnt that it doesn’t matter that the transaction appears genuine (documents, people you trust, etc), always go one step and verify. In my case, I never knew I can check the details of car ownership from the DVLA before making payments. Please don’t be like me, always, ALWAYS do your background checks before investing your hard-earned resources into such assets! Buyer beware!!!
• Inasmuch as we are not to look a gift horse in the mouth, please be mindful that not all help is helpful. At the time when I found out the car documentation was not in proper order and decided to park it at the police station, a ‘good Samaritan/Ghanaian’ offered to help resolve the issue when he heard it. The whole help was because I was a woman, had a little child and genuinely bought the car, this shouldn’t be happening to me. A few times, I have asked myself what does he have to gain, why is he ‘helping’? But the truth is help shouldn’t be offered because somebody will gain anything from the process so I ignored everything and have learnt the lesson the hard way
• You must also know that no matter what you are going through, there are people who are genuinely willing to help in whatever way they can and I have been fortunate to be surrounded by such a circle of some amazing friends which proves the point that family is not and should not always be blood.
• Things happen, people change but life must go on…. Nobody cared that I was having a terrible year, the work must be done because there are deliverables and timelines that must be met. I have a child with special needs that needs me to be present and responsive to his needs. No matter what you are/may be going through, you need to find the energy to dig deep and find the strength that will help you to show up and deliver, even if showing up means asking for the help you need.
• Never, ever lose your smile because it is the best makeup you can ever wear, it costs nothing and gives a lot to the people who you share it with. Keep smiling, it looks good on you!

I lost my car in 2019 and still don’t know how that issue is going to pan out but I learnt a very valuable lesson that will guide generations that will come after me – no child, sibling, friend, colleague or even acquaintance of mine will fall victim to something like this, not if I can help it. I lost my freedom for two days and it confirmed to me that not everybody behind bars is guilty and unfortunately in Ghana, you are not innocent until proven guilty, you are guilty until proven innocent (I experienced it)! I may not readily have a job waiting for me but I know this phase of my life is in the bigger image as ordained by God and so I’m going to trust Him and believe that He is working it all out for my good.

His word says ‘for I am going to do something new. See, I have already begun, do you not see it? I will make a pathway through the wilderness and I will create rivers in the dry wasteland!’ (Isaiah 43:19). This is a promise I’m holding on to hence the calm demeanour you see…

Happy new year to you and yours. Remember, this year will be what you put into it: trust God but do your part and know that God still answers prayers through our fellow men so stay alert spiritually, emotionally, psychologically and physically. It’s going to be a great year, believe it and claim it! Be inspired! Be hopeful!! And be filled with joy!!!